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Quirky and Humorous Quotes

These are the humorous and sometimes profound things that have been told to me by clients or colleagues over the years, or that I have overheard in public.

I share these in good faith, not wishing to belittle anyone, but rather to show that even in times of despair a little light can flicker.

You will find that you relax as you breathe out, that your heart-rate will usually slow a little as you exhale:
"I can't spend the rest of my life breathing out"

Stability in relationships is important:
"He bought me a kebab, a bloody kebab, and all I want is a stable life"

It is important to take up a hobby or other interest:
"One day I hope to learn how to play the saxophone, but I'm not holding my breath"

It is important not to feel alienated from your family:
"My parents and their atmospheres"

Intimate relationships can be confusing:
"Sex has always been a bone of contentment"